HERE IT IS... Guitars SUCK 2: Return of the SUCK!

For discussion of all general music topics, Favored Nations artists, Vai-related musicians and all other artists and bands.
Zebula77
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Yeah, I know. I've got the album, hehe.
NatiFable
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The Guitar Dorks:
Christophe Godin
Goncalo Pereira
Dave Martone
Rusty Cooley

Here we go again...

Godin? What a joke, what a hack. Sweeping is fun, because it makes even the most novice player 'think' that he's actually playing something. He's loving the attention isn't he? Someone get an Anvil we can throw on him! The classic "if you learn one sweep lick and move it around, you have ALOT of sweeping licks"!!! Wow!

Goncalo...Such concentration on the tiny classical piece. I was waiting for him to 'drool' all over the neck! If you know anything about classical guitar, you know he has NO tone at all in his hands. Yet, we get to hear a shrill little piece that would make Parkening want to quit forever.

Another in the loooonnnnggg line of 'hey, listen to this sweeeeppping lick-man, I'm so fast. This is so much easier than actually developing my chops!"

Martone-What is up with this guy? The guy just went spastic! Like he just climaxed in his pants. Notice the band members, it's like they are looking at the crowd to say-"Oh, boy, here comes the 'magic' baby!!!-Here's the showstopper!, Tell Vai to just send Brother Martone all his earthly possesions" Oh brother. I have always loved the "Oh yeah, here is the lick from Hell, don't even think about playing this, I'm at the very end of my technical tether" jaw agape, eyes squinting LOOK! haha

Rusty: What can you posssibly say about Rusty-He's the greatest guitarist who has ever lived. <sarcasm turned all the way up> The funniest part of this video is that his daughter is louder than he is! That paper didn't fly off because of his awesomeness-it tried to jump to it's death!

Rusty is by far the biggest joke in guitar. There is absolutely NO substance, none. This is all he does, all day, everyday, forever. If by some miracle of the universe he actually played a melody-it will be by total accident. And his body would convulse like an addict from withdrawl. He'd start smacking his head like 'Rain Man' and scream in a high pitched voice!

Wow, Rusty, we're not worthy, really we're not "The Butcher" huh? Please, stop 'butchering' us, please, really we're not worthy...<of this sh*t...>

Rusty has always struck me as: Married a girl that works from 9-5, maybe a second job. Pays all the bills, takes care of the kids, and doesn't ever sleep because Rusty is always playing till 5 in the morning, getting ready for his next music store appearance, even if he's not scheduled, just shows up to perform for the customers. Y'know that guy, everyone knows that guy. Forever auditioning lead singers, so that he might actually <yeah right> write songs. Anyway....


The Real Deals
Jimi Hendrix-A guitar god. Absolute brilliance. This was how long ago? The man plays with 'Fire', fire that burns from the center of his musical soul. You can hear the attitude in everything he sings and plays!

Steve Vai-Guitar at it's best. Typical performance from Steve-Awesome. He and Joe are very consistant in their virtuousity.

Joe Satriani-Joe's the King. Great great great player with tons of feel. He goes from in your face jamming to such soulful bending.

Shawn Lane-Now we're talking. Lane, the total opposite of Rusty. So you KNOW he's GOOD! haha What a talent! God up in heaven wanted Shawn back man, needed to hear what kind of music Randy, SRV, Jimi and all the rest would come up with!

Yngwie Malmsteen-wow, and not in a good way. The difference between Vai playing with an orchestra and Yngwie doing the same is worlds different. I remember reading an interview with Yngwie where he talked about this performance and he actually said he was 'humbled' by how incredible the musicians behind him were. He was just waaayyyy over his head on this thing. Sounded choppy, didn't even attempt to adjust his volume or tone to blend with the orchestra. Another stupid attempt <Metallica is the other big one> to feel like-"Imagine the possiblility of ME, playing with an orchestra, I'll be like Pagannini himself!" But the vision and the reality were miles apart.

I put Yngwie in the 'Real Deal' part because he does have alot to offer, he is a player. I honestly don't like his playing, but he belongs in this group. I mean in the "not right away, off the tip of your tongue" belong but after you go through about two or three hours of players, Yngwie's right there! haha

That was actually alot of fun. Thanks

peace and light
Blade Runner
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Natie: Nice post. What you said about Cooley was great. I agree, hahahahaha.
Shy Boy
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Wow… I can not believe you wasted all that time writing that crap, and I can’t believe I wasted my time reading it. It’s obvious you haven’t really listened to Godin, Cooley, Martone, or Pereira. I also find it amazing how many assumptions you make constantly.

Godin is a really kind and funny guy who has worked for years to become a great guitarist and musician. You’re picking on him because he’s “loving the attention?” The guy deserves some attention! He’s very poorly known considering his talent, and that was one of the very few times a website recognized him for it. He took the time out to do the interview, answer questions, and give nice demonstrations. No one is forcing you to watch it! The clip I used was a joke, and obviously you have no sense of humor. He himself acknowledged that he hadn’t practiced sweeping much. He moves forward with technical ability only for the sake of expression, so if a particular technique doesn’t serve his music often, then he doesn’t waste time on it.

The Mozart piece G.P. covered was very nice and was clearly a lot of fun to play and to watch. Nothing about it was shrill, and I’m sure Mozart himself would have had fun with it. G.P. is an extremely versatile musician with loads of tone, and anyone with half a brain would agree with that.

You’re cutting down Dave Martone for being physically expressive on stage? He’s just grooving with the music. Most great performers have an outlet for that. What’s really funny is that you claim to love Vai, and Steve is a million times guiltier of acting and looking dorky on stage. You need to lighten up man (maybe try prying that stick out of your a**). As far as Martone’s playing is concerned… he has an amazing body of work. Any instrumental guitar fan would really dig it. Plus, his playing is just phenomenal. Much better than yours, I’m sure. He’s welcome to show it off when people come and PAY to see him do it.

Rusty is an awesome player with a great sense of melody, and he can (and he does) do much more than shred metal guitar music. If you weren’t just rambling non-stop with absolutely nothing to back your statements up, then you’d already know that. Maybe if your ear was trained well enough to hear the complexity and the flow of his music (and maybe if you’d actually listen without incessant egotistical mental noise) you could see the beauty in his songs. Obviously you don’t get it and you don’t want to, so why in the hell do you watch it?! Jesus, you must be retarded to waste your own life like that.

Not that your personal-attacks deserve a response, but just so you know, Rusty is almost definitely the primary source of income for his family. He gets his kids to school in the morning, works at home, teaches all week, and he has other obligations to his sponsors (plus his band and recording). He has to work hard to make a living as a musician, and I’m sure his wife knew who she was marrying. Why in the hell would you attack him over his private life which you know NOTHING about?

These guys are great guitarist and good people. You on the other hand are pathetic. I’d be willing to bet that these guys have more skill in their pinky than you do in your entire body. Either way, you’re definitely a much bigger attention-grabbing jerk than you’re trying to make them out to be. Maybe you should stop watching videos just to waste time bitching about them afterwards, and practice your guitar instead.
Zebula77
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I agree. That just wasn't very cool, man.
cioran
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Zebula77 wrote:I agree. That just wasn't very cool, man.
I concur. Yes, Yngwie was an embarrasment, but then he often is - the rest of the time he's brilliant. The Mozart piece was awfully played, but no point in judging the guy's entire work on that clip. And yes, Rusty is awful - I've got the album and I've listened plenty, and the "complexity" simply isn't there. Still, amazing shredding for as long as you can stand it.

That, NatiFable, is a brief point of view, on which I'll elaborate in the unlikely event that anybody gives a damn. No unfounded personal attacks, no wanking off at my keyboard to produce mediocre sarcasms and uninspired, insipid wittiness. If bitterness is all you're into, take a couple of writing classes and con someone into giving you a biweekly column in a semi-educated indie rag.

All else being equal, Shawn is the Man.
Waugh
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Shy Boy wrote:
Blade Runner wrote:That first guy actually said "sorry, Yngwie" just because he was doing some arpeggios. pffffft.
Godin isn’t a shredder. Listen to his music, you might like it. The video was a joke, and he improvised it on the spot when he was asked to talk about sweeping techniques.
entirely true. I had the chance of meeting Christophe couple of times, and he's one of the kindest, funniest and most modest person I've met so far. The fact is that he's always making jokes! And this, is one of its ! Is music and musical approach ressembles him: funny as hell.

by the way, he says "sorry jimmy", not yngwie, apologing for his "profanation", wich is funny and proves that he's just kidding.
NatiFable
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Listen up. I can and will have my own opinion. My rants are to be read in the 'good buddy' way. I've said it a million times. There are alot of you that really read way to much into what I've written! And y'know, that's your problem, not mine.

As if none of you have ever bashed another guitarist!!! Plllleaaasseee.

Who has never bashed? Let him/her that has never bashed another guitarist throw the first strat!, Come on! I'm being heavy on the biblical paraphrase.

Please people, I can feel that pout from way over here!!!

I never said Rusty was a welfare case. I said, He has "always struck me as" and "we all know that guy", y'know, the guy that just stays home all day, is pale, vitamin d deficiant and just plays the same riff forever. Oh, okay, that last 'riff' part is Rusty!


To ShyBoy:

You have alot of nerve to say that Steve Vai himself is a million times guiltier of acting and looking dorky on stage? Not only because it's very bad grammar but Hey, a little respect for STEVE and HIS MESSAGE BOARD HERE! :shock: Mind your manners son, head over to Martone's board....oh wait...you can't-OUCH.

I'm glad you know Rusty that well. Tell him I think he's great <sarcasm needle breaks off meter>

Uhm, not to be a picky guy but I was only 'bitching' about half of the people in the video, and only wasted half my time.

So Mr. Shyboy <it's funny how you've taken one of Steve Vai's goofy songs as your handle> Have you ever said anything bad <oops, I guess you have...how did that happen?> about another guitarist?



To ciron: Good for you!!! Keep up the great work. So at what point in your nimby-namby rambling of 'ciron is fair to the world and would never use 'unfounded personal attacks' did you forget when you closed your little piece? To bad you had to ruin your 'walks on water' stance by attacking me junior! haha

Could you reference any bi-weekly semi-educated indie rags I could apply or is this just your attempt at humor? I really couldn't tell. If you want to come off as 'alturistic' then maybe you should seek a little 'snip snip' of an editor as well.

"Sticks and Stones Love" to quote Jack Sparrow"

peace and light :roll:
Shy Boy
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… This guy actually got on me for bad grammar? He also misquoted me as the example. Speaking of quotes, you should probably work on yours, NatiFable. That, and your sentences read like html code.

This may be vai.com’s message board, but there’s no hiding Steve’s showmanship. Exotic costume changes, led helmets and highly choreographed performances are much dorkier than Dave Martone making a face stupid face when he plays something. Just so we’re clear, I’m not tearing Steve or Martone down for any of this. I very much like Vai’s shows. I was only pointing out that you probably shouldn’t be attacking Martone for showmanship when you’re clearly goo-goo for Vai’s theatrics.

“So Mr. Shyboy <it's funny how you've taken one of Steve Vai's goofy songs as your handle> Have you ever said anything bad <oops, I guess you have...how did that happen?> about another guitarist?”

How is “NatiFable” any better than “Shy Boy?” It’s just a damn handle man, and mine happens to reflect something about Vai.
“I can and will have my own opinion.”

No one is trying to deny you your opinion. We just don’t appreciate someone coming here to act stupid and bash guitarists. You’re not my “good buddy,” so I read your posts exactly how you write them. No amount of “>’s,” horrible attempts at sarcasm, italicized text and random small lettering is going to make you look like less of a jerk.
John
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I happen to know Cristophe Godin personally.
This is some amateur video that was filmed for a webzine or something. It more of a was a joke that was absolutely not meant to be taken seriously, and it was uploaded to google video without his consent. Judging him based on this thing is ignorant and stupid. He's one of the nicest, most humble and down to earth people out there, and he's also incredibly funny. Oh, I also love his music.
Shy Boy
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Thank you for being the third person to clear that one up. It's sad that some people are actually dumb enough not to get that Godin was only playing around. I used it as the opening clip because I thought it was funny and would introduce the title of the movie well, which is also a joke in case anyone is confused.
winkles4269
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NatiFable wrote:Listen up. I can and will have my own opinion. My rants are to be read in the 'good buddy' way. I've said it a million times. There are alot of you that really read way to much into what I've written! And y'know, that's your problem, not mine.

As if none of you have ever bashed another guitarist!!! Plllleaaasseee.

Who has never bashed? Let him/her that has never bashed another guitarist throw the first strat!, Come on! I'm being heavy on the biblical paraphrase.
:


*throws strat at* (i use LPs anyways..)I didnt read all of that post, theres no point to...first off, Yngwie is the greatest shredder of all time, period. He invented the genre of shred with his relase of Rising Force in...1981? i dunno i'm prolly wrong on the year...

second off...guitarists are supposed to be known for being nice to other guitarists, and not showing off....thats what lead singers do...so we shouldnt bash other guitarists.....leave that shit to the lead singers...


OH and for the record its A LOT, not ALOT you dumbass!! there is a SPACE!! didnt you go to school?? and before you start...bashing on other guitarists....keep your opinions to yourself...i'm sure back in the day your gym teacher made you do enough push ups..erm.i mean...made you TRY to do enough push ups to understand that...you shouldve had it figured out then...why dont we see you post some chops that are better than these no named...flops??
cioran
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NatiFable wrote:Listen up. I can and will have my own opinion. My rants are to be read in the 'good buddy' way. I've said it a million times. There are alot of you that really read way to much into what I've written! And y'know, that's your problem, not mine.

As if none of you have ever bashed another guitarist!!! Plllleaaasseee.

Who has never bashed? Let him/her that has never bashed another guitarist throw the first strat!, Come on! I'm being heavy on the biblical paraphrase.

Please people, I can feel that pout from way over here!!!

I never said Rusty was a welfare case. I said, He has "always struck me as" and "we all know that guy", y'know, the guy that just stays home all day, is pale, vitamin d deficiant and just plays the same riff forever. Oh, okay, that last 'riff' part is Rusty!


To ShyBoy:

You have alot of nerve to say that Steve Vai himself is a million times guiltier of acting and looking dorky on stage? Not only because it's very bad grammar but Hey, a little respect for STEVE and HIS MESSAGE BOARD HERE! :shock: Mind your manners son, head over to Martone's board....oh wait...you can't-OUCH.

I'm glad you know Rusty that well. Tell him I think he's great <sarcasm needle breaks off meter>

Uhm, not to be a picky guy but I was only 'bitching' about half of the people in the video, and only wasted half my time.

So Mr. Shyboy <it's funny how you've taken one of Steve Vai's goofy songs as your handle> Have you ever said anything bad <oops, I guess you have...how did that happen?> about another guitarist?



To ciron: Good for you!!! Keep up the great work. So at what point in your nimby-namby rambling of 'ciron is fair to the world and would never use 'unfounded personal attacks' did you forget when you closed your little piece? To bad you had to ruin your 'walks on water' stance by attacking me junior! haha

Could you reference any bi-weekly semi-educated indie rags I could apply or is this just your attempt at humor? I really couldn't tell. If you want to come off as 'alturistic' then maybe you should seek a little 'snip snip' of an editor as well.

"Sticks and Stones Love" to quote Jack Sparrow"

peace and light :roll:
Thanks for getting my handle wrong, and for missing the point entirely.
I more or less expected you to, frankly, as your reading appears to be as sloppy as your writing.
The lesson comes in two parts; a) a humdrum little rundown of opinions that noone gives a shit about; b) a small dose of the vitriol you distribute so freely. Your assignment for next week is to embellish the a) without taking recourse to b).
We had a little run-in a while back where I ended up apologizing for getting fed up with your style and saying so. No more. Your "opinions" and your self-proclaimed "good buddy" style is a poor facade for lashing out at people any way you can in manner that reeks of self-indulgence and borderline hysteria. (This is me walking on water.)

As it is, Shy Boy's efforts to bring something positive to this forum have been hijacked, which is a damn shame. I'll happily argue Rusty's talent or lack thereof with him. Rants we have had enough of.
NatiFable
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OH and for the record its A LOT, not ALOT you dumbass!! there is a SPACE!! didnt you go to school?? and before you start...bashing on other guitarists....keep your opinions to yourself...i'm sure back in the day your gym teacher made you do enough push ups..erm.i mean...made you TRY to do enough push ups to understand that...you shouldve had it figured out then...why dont we see you post some chops that are better than these no named...flops??
:D Dumbass? Comma after OH. Capitalize There, and didnt <by the way it's 'didn't' use ' . and before you start-Is not only a run on sentence but there is absolutely no sentence structure to speak of. In fact your capatilization is horrible young one.

'Flops' is your word not mine. Reading and writing comprehension is obviously beyond a 'genius' like yourself. I'm so happy that we didn't go to the same school!

Breathe whenever you're angry. Okay?

peace and light
NatiFable
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Shy Boy wrote:… This guy actually got on me for bad grammar? He also misquoted me as the example. Speaking of quotes, you should probably work on yours, NatiFable. That, and your sentences read like html code.

This may be vai.com’s message board, but there’s no hiding Steve’s showmanship. Exotic costume changes, led helmets and highly choreographed performances are much dorkier than Dave Martone making a face stupid face when he plays something. Just so we’re clear, I’m not tearing Steve or Martone down for any of this. I very much like Vai’s shows. I was only pointing out that you probably shouldn’t be attacking Martone for showmanship when you’re clearly goo-goo for Vai’s theatrics.

“So Mr. Shyboy <it's funny how you've taken one of Steve Vai's goofy songs as your handle> Have you ever said anything bad <oops, I guess you have...how did that happen?> about another guitarist?”

How is “NatiFable” any better than “Shy Boy?” It’s just a damn handle man, and mine happens to reflect something about Vai.
“I can and will have my own opinion.”

No one is trying to deny you your opinion. We just don’t appreciate someone coming here to act stupid and bash guitarists. You’re not my “good buddy,” so I read your posts exactly how you write them. No amount of “>’s,” horrible attempts at sarcasm, italicized text and random small lettering is going to make you look like less of a jerk.
Hi there Shyboy!!! How are you doing today? I hope you're doing very well. My point is you have bashed guitarists on this site!

Jerk or not, I do not care, okay? Got that. I'm sorry we do not live in a world that agrees with everything YOU want, or any of you for that matter.

My handle is not any better than anyone else's. I just think it's funny that you can knock Vai and have your handle. That's all. There may be no hiding Steve's style but you also didn't have to bash it either.


I'm also glad that no one is trying to deny my opinions! Geez, I never felt that for one moment. Come on. Now you're just being silly! Of course we can all have our own opinions. That goes without saying...

peace and light
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